The most top, top, top footballer in the world
The Guardian -

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It was a busy old night at football’s leading backslappery bash in Paris, reader. Folk who get angry on social media disgraces about which footballer has the “sickest tekkers” took to their bedrooms to watch the Ballon d’Or awards, the annual jamboree in which footballers squeeze into ill-fitting suits and pretend to be happy for rival players who rank higher than them in the voting to determine, playground-style, who are the most top, top, top...

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